Saggy knees and flat feet…..

So I thought we would start with a deep topic. Something that has kept me from completing many a task by allowing my ADHD mind to wonder deep in thought………where did I get my feet and knees???

I have thanked my mother….I believe they are hers. I know that I have other wonderful traits physically from her that I am thankful for. Our hair…it’s always been thick and healthy. My petite frame……thank you mom for so much that you have given me…..truly….but my knees and feet…..that one…well I’m fighting bitterness regarding.

I have a friend with beautiful feet. I will call her “Fancy Feet”. Her toes are as long as fingers and look as if they could play a concert piece on a piano. Her arch is like a ballerina’s. I remember sitting next to her in couples class one Sunday morning…her pretty feet and “childhood friend” husband would sit next to me on Sundays in our Sunday School class. She would rotate her “flashy” feet right in front of us. Distracting me from our Sunday lesson. Despite our foot differences we were good friends. Distracted by her flashy feet, I would look at them in wonder…did this come natural….did she work on her feet to make them so pretty??? I started thinking…..I bet that was it….she developed her arch over time! So…..while others were contemplating the depths of their spiritual relationships, I decided to work on the arch of my foot. I had such pretty sandals on that morning. I remember exactly what pair they were. Brown T-straps….gorgeous…but lacking in comparison to my “flashy footed friend”. My “fancy footed friend” was sitting next to me oblivious to the beauty she was soon going to behold when I arched my foot as much as I could…..and I have to tell you….my feet looked good, really good. My toes even looked longer. The polish sparkled and I was looking at her feet, then looking at my feet and thinking………I think I have done it. That’s when it hit….no…not conviction from the lesson being taught, but a charlie horse. My toes that were looking lovely and long began to curl and my newly beautiful foot began to twist. I grabbed another friends arm and was trying to whisper through clenched teeth that I was experiencing a terrible charlie horse because of “our mutual” friends showy feet. There was no sympathy on their confused face and I could feel my fancy footed friend unknowingly gloating at my stubby, flat footed, twisted foot. Lesson learned….arches are not developed over time…..thanks mom…..

Then what about my knees??? I work out intensely twice a week. I play tennis approx three times a week. Shouldn’t my knees be beautiful??? Haven’t I earned it with exercise? I look at pictures of movie stars and models….even unkempt Brittany Spears. Their quads are defined and their knees are lean and unlined. Mine……..I was looking at my picture and couldn’t even believe I was going to post it. Is it just me or could you tell my age by the amount of rings radiating from around my knee caps. I promise…I use really good lotion. Twice a day! I’m not even tightening them! For awhile I thought that if I tightened my quads I would have the legs I see in pictures. After about six months of that great idea…. I decided to do that wonderful plan in front of a mirror and admire my gorgeous knees and about cried out loud. If you think this picture is bad….good gracious…the amount of lines when I tightened my legs….and I had been doing that in all my shorts that summer……..why didn’t I look sooner?

So, I’ve posted my knees and feet. Click on the picture and you’ll get the scariest close-up of your life….and yes…there is dirt under my sons toenails but hey it was last minute. That was really cool for a thirteen year old by the way……yep….he was not impressed and wanted to know specifically what I was doing with my “creepy” pictures. By the way… can tell by looking at his feet that he wasn’t c-section because of the size of his head….check out that big toe! Identical to his dads.

I want to see your knees and feet……grab your digital camera’s and get your kids pictures too. Whose feet and knees do you have?

Are mine like grandma’s? Seems like I remember my aunts looking like mine….I can’t remember.

This is deep stuff!

We’ll move on to lighter stuff later….let’s hit the hard stuff first!

Let me know…..



0 thoughts on “Saggy knees and flat feet…..

  • July 6, 2008 at 1:32 pm

    HILARIOUS! I need to blog about my rear-end for MY THERAPY, but I COULDN’T post a picture!

    Love ya!


  • July 8, 2008 at 3:02 pm

    That is too funny! But instead of posting a picture of your feet, why did you post Fred Flinstone’s instead? LOL

    Your loving cuz in the south…


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