The Beginner, The Crow and The Tic-Tacâ€™s.
There once was a girl who started the Yoga class for beginners.
Letâ€™s give this girl a name. A pretend name. I think she would rather that.
Letâ€™s call her Reba.
Reba loved the beginner classes. Trish, her teacher, was awesome. The class wasnâ€™t boring and really tackled some â€œrealâ€ yoga poses, which Reba liked. Reba is easily bored.
Reba was learning a lot and loving class so much, she decided she was ready for a more advanced class.
Reba decided to attend the â€œStretch and Strengthenâ€ class that YOGA inÂ the FORESTÂ offered.
Reba liked the teacher named Sue. Reba also knew that there was going to be people in the class at ALL kinds of levels, so she wouldnâ€™t feel like the only â€œnewbieâ€.
And now that RebaÂ had â€œYoga for Beginnersâ€ under her yoga beltâ€¦.she was ready for a more advanced class.
What kind of things had Reba learned in beginners class that would help her with this class?
Reba is going to share that wisdom with you.
Her new knowledgeâ€¦her insight from beginners class.
Because there was only one thing Reba worried about happening in this advanced class.
Reba was really, really worried about this ONE thing.
But, with her beginner class knowledge, she had a plan.
Reba was ready.
Reba wasnâ€™t ready for this.
This is called â€œThe Crowâ€.
Reba wasnâ€™t ready for this at all.
But when this happened to Reba in classâ€¦..
Reba wasnâ€™t stressed about this. Other people were having a difficult time with this pose too.
This pose, that Reba wasnâ€™t ready for, this wasnâ€™t worrying Reba.
This kind of pose wasnâ€™t what Reba was worried about at all.
This wasnâ€™t what she was using her beginners class wisdom for.
If that pose didnâ€™t stress Reba out, wasnâ€™t what worried her, what would?
I meanâ€¦Reba was only a beginner.
What had Reba worried about in this more advanced class you ask?
Well, Reba is going to tell you what she had worried about.
Reba worried about this.
The easy and favorite part of the class to many.
The â€œcorpse poseâ€. That definition alone is enough to sort of freak Reba out.
Shavasana signals the end of the class.
The relaxing part to most class membersâ€¦.but to Rebaâ€¦â€¦.shavasana is all she was worried about.
Reba learned in beginners class, that many times in Shavasana, the teacher has you breathe deeply.
She has you inhale completely, filling up your lungsâ€¦.then she has you blow that air out of your mouth, to expel all the â€œoldâ€ breath. The teacher does this several times with the students. She wants clean, fresh air in your lungs.
What was Reba worried about during Shavasana?
Well,Â Reba worried about â€œthat old dirty breathâ€ that she was supposed to be blowing out of her mouth and into the class.
And Reba is going to tell you somethingâ€¦â€¦â€¦Â
Reba faked blowing the breath out of her mouth when everyone else did it.
In every single class, Reba had been faking and blowing it out through her nose, instead of her mouth……. but she opened her mouthâ€¦.pretending.Â
Because Reba was afraid blowing her â€œold, dirty, lung breathâ€ out of her mouth, wasâ€¦..wellâ€¦.Â
Reba didnâ€™t want people thinking she had â€œstinky, old stuck in her lungs, smelly breathâ€. Â
So, equipped with her beginner class knowledge, Reba was ready to make sure she didnâ€™t have to be worried anymore.
Reba felt so smart.
Part 3 The Tic Tac
With her plan Reba felt so smart, that is, until this â€œcrowâ€ pose happened.
Why would this bother Reba if this wasnâ€™t what she was worried about???
Because Rebaâ€™s planâ€¦.the one where she was going to make sure she didnâ€™t blow stinky breath into class……
That plan went bad when Reba had to attempt this pose.
Because Reba had smartly planned to mask her stinky breath, at the appropriate time, with tiny tic tacâ€™s.
And Reba had those tiny tic tacs in a place that she could get them easily and without anyone noticing.
Reba hid them in her â€œfolded-over-waistband of her yoga pantsâ€.
And when this happenedâ€¦..when this pose was attemptedâ€¦â€¦.
A smart planâ€¦.. went stupid.
They were â€œplinkingâ€ out of her â€œfolded-over-waistband of her yoga pantsâ€, like a penny jackpot in a slot machine.
They were â€œplinkingâ€ out of her waistband, and slipping out at the same time that Rebaâ€™s teacher was doing the pose right next to her,Â to help her.
And all Reba could think aboutâ€¦.while trying to attempt the poseâ€¦.
All Reba could think about, were the tic tacâ€™s, that looked as big as horse pills, â€œplinkingâ€ out of her â€œfolded- over-waistband of her yoga pantsâ€ and onto her mat.
Reba couldnâ€™t even concentrate on the pose.
Reba quickly attempted this pose and was relieved when her teacher moved to another area of the classroom. Rebaâ€™s attempt was rather comical but Reba wasnâ€™t even worried about that. All Reba could think about was the â€œHORSE SIZEDâ€ tic tacâ€™s now scattered on her mat.
Reba then had to put her feet on her tic tacâ€™s, sliding her foot casually around the mat to gather them.
AND Reba had to keep them under her feet for what seemed like hours during several poses, to hide them. Reba knew that her patient, beginner teacher Trish and the kind, Yoga in Common owner Linda and a pretty, gorgeous, perfectly toned, experienced yoga girlâ€¦.that they were all on mats behind her and they may see what happened. There was no way she was going to gather the scattered tic tacâ€™s and let them see that!Â
So, Reba kept them under her feet.Â It was hard to do the additional poses all while maneuvering sticky tic tacs under Rebaâ€™s feet. But Reba was determined.
Soon Reba was able to slide, the â€œnow sticky tic tacâ€™sâ€, under her mat until after class.
Reba knew very well that she could not eat them, although she still pondered it.
And during shivasanaâ€¦.because Rebaâ€™s tic tacs were under her matâ€¦..like lumps the size of bouldersâ€¦Reba could only think about her tic tac fiasco.
And when it was time to inhale and exhale the old breathâ€¦.because of her now inedible tiny tic tacsâ€¦.. Reba had to â€œpretendâ€ blow the â€œstinkyâ€ breath out of her mouthâ€¦.again.
And during the rest of shivasanaâ€¦when she was supposed to be NOT thinkingâ€¦..Reba couldnâ€™t stop thinking that MAYBEÂ her teacher HAD seen her â€œplinkingâ€ tic tacâ€™s falling from her yoga pants.
Reba thoughtâ€¦. what if, while the tic tacâ€™s were spilling out of her yoga pants, her sweet teacher Sue, was puzzledâ€¦â€¦ and what if, even at that quiet shivasana momentâ€¦. what if her teacher was thinking that â€œpoor beginner Rebaâ€ must have a major halitosis problem?
Reba finished that class and got out of there.
Reba was embarrassed.
But what is plaguing Reba mostâ€¦.
What Reba can hardly stop thinking, now that the class is over and Reba is safely home.
What is keeping Reba from sleeping tonight.
What ifâ€¦Rebaâ€™s teacher wasnâ€™t worried about halitosis??????!!!!!!!
What if ??Â What if.â€¦..Rebaâ€™s teacher thinks Reba had tic tacâ€™sâ€¦â€¦.. in her underpants?
They looked like they were â€œplinkingâ€ out of her yoga pantsâ€¦.Â
Which houses her â€œunderpantsâ€!!Â
What if Rebaâ€™s teacher saw that and thinks Reba has a weird smelly problem?????
And was trying to mask that problem with tic tacâ€™s!!!!!!!!
Reba is humiliated.
Which is why Reba wanted you to know her story about the beginners class, the crow and the tic tacâ€™s.
Reba doesnâ€™t want you to ever worry that you will feel out of place in class. Reba is apparently going to take care of that for everyoneâ€¦..IN THE WORLD, by doing ANYthing that could make ANYone, feel like a yoga dork.
And Reba also wants you all to know why she may have to now sell her house and move from the country.
And if she doesnâ€™t move from the country and goes back to class, she wants her teacher to know why tic tacâ€™s were â€œplinkingâ€ from her WAISTBAND in her yoga pants and she wants her teacher to know that they were NOT â€œplinkingâ€ out of her â€œunderpantsâ€.Â
Reba just wants her to know that.
PS. This is from the Yoga Out Loud Series, that I (Reba-Rebecca) am writing and sharing, chronicling my true experiences at learning Yoga. I would love for you to join me!!!! You can follow this link to find the class schedules for Yoga in Common or Yoga in the Forest. Click “here”. I would love to meet you!
ps. If you have any â€œfunnyâ€ or â€œembarrassingâ€ stories that you would like to share that happened to you during yoga or an exercise classâ€¦. Reba would really, really appreciate it. You can comment rightÂ here.Â Love, Reba